found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
