What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
