There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Randomize
