three words: i give head
three words: not that well
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Drunk is not a location!
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize
