woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
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She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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