If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
