I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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