I wish I only lived at night.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Randomize