I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize