My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize