Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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