she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
