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• (904): View more from Florida

  how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard

  Fav 13 1185 2126

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in

  Fav 27 1167 4015

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.

  Fav 11 4823 870

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• (607): View more from New York

  I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.

  Fav 12 4994 1117

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  These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook

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• (631): View more from New York

  Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk

  Fav 18 1309 4958

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??

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  25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.

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• (716): View more from New York

  Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"

  Fav 5 771 559

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• (941): View more from Florida

  She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.

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