do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.