Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
