let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think I have vodka in my lungs
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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