and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
