physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize