I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
