I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
wow bdsm is so cute
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
