I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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