Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
