I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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