More tranny stories later!
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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