Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
