don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
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