kristin has been a bad kristin
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i used baking grease as lip gloss
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Randomize
