How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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