Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
