I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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