Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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