its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
