Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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