you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
