you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
