My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
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Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
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Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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