Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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