I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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