Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
