Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
