so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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