i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
