i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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