new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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