By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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