fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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