I swear she didn't look like that last week.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
