How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize