How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
