apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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